i've fallen for a boy. the sweetest, cutest, most amazing blue-eyed boy i've ever met.

i really think i'm in love with this boy. he makes me so happy & always says the right things at the right times.

it's all fantastic. we spent all day friday with each other. it was just us on friday. we took the bus to milwaukee, i sat between him & his cousin who hitched a ride. this boy knows exactly what he wants & doesn't wait. he grabbed my hand & we sat there the entire ride with our fingers linked. we walked around Summerfest, aimlessly for a long time. we were still hand in hand. we chilled on the rocks by the lake after it got done raining. over the lake was the most magnificent rainbow i had ever see in my entire life. it went from one end of the lake to the other & was so bright & vibrant, it was amazing. after we did that, we walked around trying to find ourselves dinner & he ended up paying for my dinner. after that we watched The Flobots perform. :D that was absolutely fabulous. i felt like a total hippie & loved it. i felt so free. we rode the bus back into town & he had my hand the whole time. he dropped me off at my house & walked me to the door. his cousin just sat in the car. before he left he said he had a wonderful time & leaned in and kissed me. :) the smile didn't leave my face for the longest time.

all day yesterday, too. we were at summerfest again. we were with a bunch more people, mostly people from work & stuff, but that's okay. :D we walked around, again. we didn't hold hands at first, mostly because i don't want anyone i know to see... i still have my boyfriend... :| but eventually the best friend just told me to grab his damn hand, so i did. and it was amazing. we sat on the rocks again, trying to dodge the seagulls, waiting for more people. eventually we found the people we were waiting for & just walked around more. he got a shirt & i got earrings, so did the best friend. we were with a crazy crowd. one of his friends, who is about twice my height, jumped on his shoulders & they were running around throwing green tea on people, yelling, "the power of christ compels you!" and so on. then the kid got on another kid's shoulders. they started running around & he took off his shirt and was giving people high fives. it was great. :)

i'm sure all of work is going to know something is going on with us by tomorrow... people don't like to keep their mouths shut, especially when it has to do with people who work there, & both of us do... that's how we met, actually. :| hahah. but yeah. :)

i've been in such a good mood since friday night & i love it. :D he makes me so happy and free.

he says the sweetest things & i love it. he calls me beautiful, breathtaking, gorgeous, incredible, amazing, awesome, and everything you can possibly imagine.

he says he's, "madly in love with me." and i believe him. i think i'm in love with him, too. :)  nothing in my life has ever felt right, & this feels so incredible. i can't stop thinking about him, about the way he makes me laugh, the way he smiles, the way he looks into my eyes, the way he kisses me on my head, the way he says goodbye, with a kiss, everything about him.

i text him at work & everything he says is nothing like anything i've ever heard from a boy.
r: "so... there's this really cute boy at work..."
a: "and he can't get his mind of this randi girl..."
r: "he makes her so happy..."
a: "she's beautiful..."
r: "she can't keep the smile off her face..."
-or-
r: "you're cute..."
a: "i can't keep my eyes off of you..."

it's just little stuff like that. or like after i left summerfest last night, because i had to be home early, he texted me about 10 minutes afterwards saying he missed me & wishes i was still in his arms.

i fall asleep with my phone in my hand from texting him all night. i wake up to find cute texts he sent me after i had dozed off. he keeps my heart racing, the butterflies in my stomach never settle down, and i feel like this is the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me.

we only have two minor dilemmas:
one: i have a boyfriend, who i don't want to hurt. we're supposed to be getting married when we're older, we're supposed to grow old & all that stuff. i love him, i'm just not in love with him. he's a wonderful guy, i just don't feel the same with him anymore. all my love just died & i don't feel right with him.
two: his best friend & a good friend of mine, whom we work with, is madly in love with him & is heart broken because he's fallen for me... they liked each other a while back, so she had her chance. she always jokes about marrying him when they're older & all this stuff but it was just innocent joking. she's upset but i'm not supposed to know. she thought i was mad at her earlier...

"We're the perfect couple, just not the the most perfect situation."
So very true right now.  Sometimes I hate this situation we're in.  Being 4 hours and 30 minutes apart isn't that much, but when you're in high school, it seems that way.  Not many people understand what we're going through, but soon enough they will.  They'll all be in the same situation, due to college & I honestly won't feel any sympathy for them.  I can guarantee their, "Ohh, I'm sorry"'s are fake and so is the sympathy for me.  I can tell.
Oh well, I'll be fine.  I'll be with him soon enough.  :]  Nothing makes me happier than seeing him, seeing him smile, seeing his gorgeous eyes, seeing his face light up when we see each other.  NOTHING MAKES ME HAPPIER. 

Yay.
14 more days as of tomorrow.  Then I get to see him.  I get to wear a dress & feel beautiful at the same time. :]  I'm excited.